Do You Know How Relationships Work?

The #5 reason you cannot find love is because you lack relationship skills.  While you believe you developed them, most have not.  Everyone knows you hire an engineer to do engineering jobs.  And you hire an accountant to do accountant jobs.  Yet, when it comes to the most important job

in our lives, we hire people with no training or education.  

The most important person in your life is your spouse.  They affect every aspect of your life.  When they come in our lives, all they have is trial and error.  Would you hire a brain surgeon who learn his craft by trial and error and no medical school? 

When we fail in one relationship or trial, we go experiment in another person’s life.  When that ends in divorce, we go to another.  It’s almost like we are doing experimental brain surgery on each intimate partner.  We wonder why divorce is so mentally debilitating.  And your employer still has to pay you.  Ha!!!! 

Most say communication is the most important part of a relationship.  Inside of communication, listening is most important.  Within a relationship, there will be misunderstandings and disagreements.  How do you handle conflict?  If you are unable to handle conflict, all relationships will be difficult for you.  What things do you do to enrich your significant other’s life?  Do you know how to develop intimacy?  Or do you see that as the other person’s job?  Can you talk about anything?  Or can you only discuss the things that make you so-called happy or comfortable?  Do you know how to negotiate?  Are you open and available to your significant other?  Or are you hiding behind a brick wall?

There is a distinction between being interesting and being interested.  Do you know the difference? Knowing that difference will dictate interactions with your significant other.  Most people want to show how interesting they are.  To do that, you never have to listen to the other person.  You simply talk ad nauseam.  

Being interested requires you to completely understand the other.  That means a lot of listening and follow up questions.  

By the way, it is not a man’s job to drive conversation.  It is the responsibility of both consenting adults.  So for all the women who believe it is their job to just sit there and let the man speak, you are showing relationships incompetence.  Don’t complain when you are not treated like an adult.  It takes 2 to make things work. 

How do you train yourself to create great relationships?  Have you considered mindset training?