What’s the #25 Reason You Can’t Find Love?

 

The number 25 reason you can’t find love is one that can be changed over night.  As children, the adults in our lives set us up to fail in relationships.  When you look at the divorce rate, you see I am not exaggerating.  When you look at the amount of relationships that will never make it to marriage, you see most people have failed their relationships before they start.  Why??? You

better believe I’m going to tell you.  

The number 25 reason you can’t find love is because you don’t understand the opposite sex.  We are told so many lies about the opposite sex when we are children.  We are told about girls being innocent and made from sugar and spice and everything nice.  Boys are made up of puppy dog tails and dirt.  Then they grow up and meet one another with no clue how to interact.  Both men and women end up using a one size fits all approach.  

On one hand, I have lived in several countries with English and non-English speakers.  What I saw was human beings.  The healthy women had uteruses and were able to carry a baby.  Men had the sex organs to impregnate women.  While living in those places, I noticed men were stronger than women, everyone ate, slept, went to the bathroom and drank fluids.  At some point, they all became angry, sad, happy, frustrated, etc.  And all healthy humans go through the experience of learning walk, talk, feed ourselves, we receive education and use it in our daily lives. 

I say all this to say there are many generalizations that all healthy humans share.  Both men and women are human and share many experiences in common.  

However, in the US, many women see men as guard dogs and ATM machines.  They have a more diplomatic way of putting it.  They say a man’s role is to provide and protect.  You don’t have to be human to do that.  That is where women miss out on the true value men can bring. 

Women are taught that men are simple, want one thing and think with their smaller head.  They are told women are smarter and more mature than men.  Yet, every civilization and industry around the world has been created by men.  How intelligent do you have to be to start with nothing and go from planning, financing, educating and employing people to build cities, towns, commerce and entertainment?  It is all done to make the lives of women safer and easier.  Except, women pretend as though men have done nothing.  All of this points to the fact women do not understand men. 

At the same time, men face a rude awakening when they learn that women are not innocent.  They have equally as desirable thoughts about sex as men.  Society tells her to hide it.  They also find women cheat.  It is not just men.  In fact, the difference between cheating wives is not much less than cheating husbands.  As a result, many men go from believing all women are innocent to women are gold diggers in a nanosecond.  This disillusionment makes communication very difficult between the sexes.  It does not help when women are told there is a battle of the sexes and they should compete against men.    

Women are not taught how to communicate with men.  Men are expected to “just know” what a woman wants.  That causes many men to check out and say “yes dear”.  

Perhaps one of the biggest differences in the way men and women are raised is that boys are taught clear consequences for any behavior.  Girls are not.  When they grow up, it becomes apparent.  You see that when you ask men what they are responsible for in relationships.  As a rule, men can answer with a long list.  When women are asked the same question, they talk about the home and children.  None of that is directly for the man.  At the most, women will talk about food and sex is what she provides for the man.  Those things are mutual.  Outside of that, she is unaware of what a man needs.  The problem is there are no consequences for her.  At most, her man cheats.  She stays because she can hold that over his head.  

Ultimately, people are not taught to deal with one another as human beings.  Each of us is individually responsible for making the relationship work.  In the 21st Century, making a relationship work means the man is responsible.  If you doubt me, listen to the slogan, happy wife happy life.  It is the man’s responsibility to make his wife happy.  That is if he wants to be happy himself.  

As you see, this is only the result of education.  We improperly educated boys and girls about the opposite sex.  If we prepare them properly, it will be easier for men and women to come together.