What’s the #20 Reason You Can’t Find Love?

 

The number 20 reason you can’t find love is an important part of a relationship.  Is it enough to make it work, though?  The #20 reason you can’t find love is because you believe

sex is all you need to make a relationship work.   

Sex is definitely important.  It is in the top 3 reasons for divorce.  Many people, men included, are not sexually fulfilled in their relationships.  Most people don’t know how to ask for what they want sexually.  It’s a touchy subject.  How does a man tell a woman she’s not that good?  Or she does not know her body very well?  The problem is most people believe they are good at it.  They simply never check in with their significant other to see if they are in fact sexually fulfilled. 

If I use myself, I can tell you I really enjoy sex.  I know. I know.  Everyone says that.  There are many times I have had sex 10 times in a day.  That kind of frequency does not come for free.  The woman needs to have a body I find appealing and know how to maintain it.  And I’ll take an attractive face to go with it.  However, that’s not enough for a relationship.  A nice body and pretty face can hold my attention for a couple of weeks.  After that, I’m not getting as much out of it as the woman believes. 

I need mental stability.  How do you handle yourself when things are not going the way you want?  What happens when there is a misunderstanding between us?  Misunderstandings happen often.  It’s not a big deal.  Except, if you are not mentally or emotionally stable, I will have to do a lot of work to stabilize the situation.  That’s more like a babysitting job. 

Also, am I being intellectually stimulated?  While I understand, some guys may say that is not important, intellect will be important for a woman’s decision making process.  It is critical if I want to have serious conversations about anything.  

I mention these things because too often women will say what they are bringing to the table is a nice body.  There is a video where a woman is asked what she brings to the table.  She said she is the table.  Then she said look at all this, meaning her body.  The implications are she is sexually desirable.  Without substance to back up that sexually attractive body, a woman can be a liability.  I’ll assume a man can be a liability to a quality woman if he is not mentally stable and lacks intellect to make good decisions.  

I can go on about the importance of other things that make a person more attractive sexually.  The point is sex by itself can make you a piece of disposable ass.  While that sounds cold, you have only yourself to blame if you set yourself up to be treated that way.  There are many ways to develop yourself.  Making sex the most valuable thing about you is usually a dead end.  Even if you want to be a sex worker, your body has a shelf life.  When it expires, your next option will be cats.  They don’t care what you lack, as long as you feed them.  

I’ll be back with the number 21 reason you can’t find love.