What’s the #30 Reason You Can’t Find Love?

This is one of those don’t shoot the messenger conversations.  And it’s a big one so put on your seatbelt.  The number 30 reason you can’t find love may seem trivial.  However, when you peel down layers, you find it is problematic in many ways.  This reason has everything to do with how you

care for yourself.  For this one, I’m going to kill 2 birds with one stone.  The pun is many are killing themselves.  So I won’t need the stone. 

The number 30 reason you can’t find love is because you don’t think mental and physical development are important.  This is not my opinion.  Let’s look at facts.  

There are many ways to develop yourself mentally and physically.  Reading books, attending workshops, seeing a therapist, hiring an executive coach are some ways to develop yourself mentally.  These are clear ways to invest in yourself and your future.  If you won’t invest in yourself, why would anyone else?  

The problem is 33% of high school graduates never read a book the rest of their lives.  That means after high school a third of people who never went to college will not read a book again.  While that should be alarming, 42% of college graduates will never read a book again.  In the US, over the past five years, 70% of US adults have not been in a bookstore and 80% of US families did not buy or read a book last year.  These are according to 2019 statistics.  

Books are easy and convenient ways to develop your mind.  Yet, close to half the people who graduated college refuse to make that investment.  This is unfortunate because books can expose you to new ideas or perspectives.  That allows you to be more open minded to learning new things.  Those new things allow you to be a better conversationalist.  That makes you more interesting on a date or in a relationship.  It also makes it easier for you to contribute knowledge and perspectives to your significant other.  With books, you might also be better informed when making important decisions.  

When it comes to decisions, you only get one body and only you are responsible for it.  If you don’t take care of your body, there is no body store to purchase a new one.  Therefore, if you don’t care for it, you can experience poor health which contributes to the inefficiency of your brain’s ability to function.  Poor brain function can cause you to make poor decisions.  That can go into many directions, including poor food choices.  Poor food choices exacerbates poor health and you see how you can be on a downward spiral.  If you are one who does not read, you may not even know you are making so many poor choices.  

If you follow that pattern, you will be a liability in a relationship.  The person who is well informed and committed to great physical and mental health is highly unlikely to choose the person with poor health.  All the body positivity videos and support groups will not increase your desirability.  

For those of you who may be upset about my words, your upset will not change your situation.  The fact is in the US 36.5% of adults are obese and 32.5% are overweight.  That means two thirds of people in the US are overweight or obese.  That’s a lot of people making poor choices.  Those poor choices are costing money.  Obese people pay more out of pocket expenses.  Your medical bills cost $1,429 more each year than people at a normal weight.  As I said, that makes you a liability.   

It’s time for you to pick up some books and go to the gym.  That can be the first step to develop yourself into the person you would like to have in your life.  That puts you on the path of compatibility.  Compatibility is the strongest foundation for a great relationship.  At the same time, if you continue to remain unhealthy and uninformed, understand who that makes you compatible for.  Besides, how can you expect to advance in life if you don’t care for your mind and body?