When I say language, my reference has nothing to do with English, Spanish or Chinese. I am asking you if you know if you speak the language of success or excuses. I am also asking you to consider the language you use when you are thinking, or speaking to yourself.
I am asking, “What do you language?” Your language is in your words, your tone, your appearance, the way you get things done and the movement of your body. Those are ways to language in the world. Do you really hear what you say when you encounter problems? How do you move? Do you language negatively when you encounter something that is considered great?
Some of you may think I’m talking about how well you communicate. Others may think I’m saying that’s the language of a pessimist or optimist. I’m saying neither. I’m saying that a pessimist is languaging something. Unfortunately, what they may be languaging is “I’m terrified of failure because I will look bad. Therefore, I have to find something wrong so I can get out of being responsible for the outcome.” That same pessimist will communicate his point very well. However, they will never tell you the language they are speaking is fear of failure.
On a personal level, people tend to language negatively when they meet someone they are attracted to. They meet the person and learn about them only to ask, “This guy or woman is so great there must be something wrong with them.” From there, they spend their time looking for any flaws. What language is that? Is it empowering for you or the other person?
If you start to listen to what you say when you encounter positive or negative people or situations, you gain insight into who you are. Why do I say that? What you say is who you are. Are you possibility or impossibility?
Take a simple example like the word ‘not’. Can you count the amount of times you use it in a 24-hour period? Try spending the next 24-hours without using the word ‘not’. You will see that it is so much a part of the English speaking culture that you actually have to think about what you really want to say. If you eliminate the word ‘not’, you will have to say what it is you really want to see happen, and this language gets you moving and talking in a much more empowering direction.
If we go back to the example of meeting someone you find attractive, your language could be something like: “I find you to be fascinating. I would like to know more about you and how you have accomplished all that you have,” or “ I want to understand what made you start to think the way you think.” This way of communicating can be very empowering for both people. For one, you acknowledge the person for being exceptional, instead of putting them down. For two, you are engaging the person instead of keeping your distance while you search for something wrong. Thirdly, you just might learn something you never knew.
Consider this. Your language reflects the world you live in. Therefore, I am suggesting that when situations arise it is to your benefit to stop and ask yourself: “What’s my language?” Also, watch the movement of your body. Then think about what you would like to see happen. From there, speak the language that is correlated to the outcome you are seeking.